Greed

This afternoon my dad SMSed me, telling me that my mum has been diagnosed with mild stroke. The doctor claimed that half of her face shows signs of numbness. I was momentarily affected but shortly later, my work swarmed and occupied me, and I almost forgot abt the SMSes.

Its scary how one can be so engrossed in work till the extent of forgetting his family. I may sound exaggerating, but even I myself was surprised by my own reaction. But the sadness crept back immediately i went home.

It has been a painful decision to turn down the interview appointment for the post of Management Executive with Singapore Customs. Today, I received another phone call from Siemens. Its for the Siemen Graduate program, which include a 12-month working program and experience multi-faceted exposure to different business units & departments, including R&D, Production, Sales, Business Admin, Engineering, Logistic, Finance etc... Wah!!!

I was instantaneously tempted as the person began to interview on the phone. Having impressed with what i have said, she asked me down for an interview anytime this week. But sad to say, I have to work! and i actually lied to her that i am working part time (musavada!). She told me to try my best to get a time off, and I have to probably musavada again to my boss for letting me go.

Its a great dilemma.. i ve said i wanted to stay at a work place for more than one yr before deciding to 'jump'. But this package is too tempting. Its really a very good exposure. On the other hand, my present company is paying and treating me very well. The snrs here have painstakingly and selflessly shared with me their experiences and advices. I will feel extremely guilty if i were to leave them. In fact, my manager got worried today when i told him abt taking a block leave for my meditation retreat. Tats becos i have gradually taken over a relatively large responsibility by now.

My mum has discouraged me from leaving comfort, while my bro supported me to pursue my 'dream' job. My fren asked me issit that i dun like my present job. Well, i think i am GREEDY. When there are better options, i will start to dislike what i have now. Shldnt i be more contented with life? Anyway its jus an interview, with so many ppl fighting for the limited number of places.

By the way, I went to Ubi Medical Clinic jus now. Feel so great tat i dun have to pay a single cent for visiting the doc! hahaha... another pulling factor tat stops me from leaving my present company :(