Preparing for Shanghai

I will be flying off next wednesday morning to Shanghai. Although I have already expected this trip since weeks ago, I nv expect it to be so early. And it occurs on the same week as my office shift. Now i am left with only 2-3 days to pack my stuffs, and there s so much more work to do....

I am never really worried about staying outside from home (or even singapore), but the only major challenge i am facing is getting air sickness. I have the phobia of getting on flights, even though i have taken airplanes so many times already in life. My first flight was taken when i was just 3mths old, and all along i would not get air-sickness while travelling on planes. I could even vividly remember myself running about on board when i was 6-7 yr old.

Unfortunately, i happened to take this flight to HK when i was very sick at the age of 11. The entire flight was a torture as i was feeling giddy and vommitted throughout the journey. Ever since then, I experienced the same giddiness whenever i board on planes. My last flight was taken 5 yrs ago and it was just as terrible, even tough it was already a 10 yr gap. The giddiness was still killing me.

A friend from EVC has passed me a special medical plaster to be pasted on my neck when travelling on planes. She told me the plaster is very effective in solving the air sickness issue, and they are only available in Korea. Thank goodness. . .she is my saviour manz!

Getting pretty excited about the trip. It will be a challenge to represent HP Asiapacific to discuss one of our soon-to-be launch products, as well as receiving training on its building process. Will be meeting otherrepresensatives from the other 2 HP regions - HP Europe and America. Finally, I couldnt get to meet some of my friends who are already stationed at Shanghai - Barry and Candy!

最熟悉的陌生人

No, this is not my favourite song, but the title really struck me for tonight.

I wonder how many of you have this similar experience, that someone who was once very close to you, suddenly seem like a stranger to you overnight?

I remembered a gal friend once shared with me her experience on this extraordinary friendship with this guy. For some special unknown reasons, they clicked very fast and began to chat on the phone almost every night. By some special reasons again, their friendships eroded twice as fast, and they behaved like strangers to each other now.

Another gal shared with me this afternoon on something pretty similar. She has broken up with her gf since 6mths ago, and she thought she has already got over the r/s. This morning, she took leave to settle some admin stuffs in town, and was reminded of this place which she used to have dates with her ex. All the words and promises made by him to her suddenly became so real and near, but she realised with a pang of unbearable force that her ex is nothing more like a stranger to her now. The break off was a sudden one.

I guess most of u shld have experienced something similar, be it friendships or bgr r/s, including myself. And when such things happened, it always leave the poor soul to ponder and wonder why the sudden change in situation.. why why why..... Well, only the other party who has chosen to turn his/her back away will know why, but she/he may not tell. The feeling sux, but what can he/she do?

As the days go by, the answer may be revealed - when the picture becomes clearer, and when the understanding deepens. It may also remain as a mystery for life. Or most likely, it may not matter to you anymore....

把握的爱情还给我

Arghhh..................

I lost one of my precious items which has been accompanying me without fail everyday!!!! And this buddy has been with me for many years. He braved with me throughout my FYP year, accompanied me for countless nights of mugging, helping to provide nourishment to my body. He also sticked with me throughout the entire yr of my first job and abt 1yr of my 2nd job. Most imptly, this buddy is always around when i needed it most badly after my intensive jogging sessions.. . where are you now!?!??!

Basket.. i was at NUS SRC changing room this evening cleaning myself up. I remembered very vividly that I took a few sips of water from my water bottle before placing it beside my bag. I stood up, changed into my new pair of t-shirt, sat down again, and wore my shoes. After which, i carried my bag and walked towards the exit. Before i reach the exit, i realised i didnt get my bottle and turned back to retreive it. To my horror, the bottle was missing!!!!

I remembered there was this china guy on my right who placed his stuffs on my right. To my left was another indian guy who was changing beside me. I tried to locate them outside the changing room but only manged to find the chinese guy. He didnt have my bottle with him. Must be that indian fellow.... stupid fool... i really hope u have taken my bottle by mistake, and not becos u r a BIG pervert who 's interested in stealing ppl's used bottle. But then, i recall too late that he was really behaving rather suspciously in the changing room, for he kept looking at me when i stood up to change my t shirt. Arghh....

Its not the money that matters, but the sentimental value of this water bottle. I have always wanted to take a picture of it and post it online to pay my tribute to it, but i always procrastinated. Fortunately, i still have one pic of it which i happened to take 1 hr before my FINAL EXAM PAPER in NUS in the central library....

Which Jane are you talking about?

I finally have had enough of my fringes and decided to cut them away. But unwilling to adopt back the armani spike hairstyle (which is kinda outdated liao), yet find myself too old to cut those punky, longish yet spiky hair style (which those superstar, campus-superstar contestants are having), I decided to have this ah-pek haircut. The typical super neat and short hairstyle that u can find many uncles sporting at your neighbourhood coffeeshops.

Photos taken before and after my haircut this evening. $9/cut, i am very pleased. Every mth i save up quite a bit compared to many of my friends who spent abt $40-60 for a haircut at those salons, which they claim to be very professional, in and trendy. Well, i do agree their hairstyles are definitely more stylish, but the face is still the same lah.. ..... unless u r v good looking, if not, dun bother to spend so much la, hahahahaha

I have quite a few 'Janes' in my NUS electrical engin lectures, and i happen to know all of them personally. Interestingly, it occured many times on separate occasions that when my friends (different) wanted to mention abt this particular jane, they ended up using the same way to describe her:

friend: eh i saw your friend jane that day leh..
me: Oh, which jane?
friend: The one driving van lo....

Muahahahahahahhahaa....................... It seems that this Jane has already been labelled as the van-driving jane..hahaa. . The other one that we sometimes mention is often refered as the rich indonesian jane, while the 3rd one, i think nobody ever mention b4 eh..

Partners

Its another lazy sunday for me again, slow-paced and relaxing. One of my fellow Lion mates came to my house this aftn to look for me to touch up our rides together. His name is Shirong, also working in MHA - Wah how come so many of my friends work there...

SR needed some help in installing the fluorescent lamps in the rear cabin, and I did my part in helping him do up the wirings (elec engineer not put to shame this time round). I also brought him to a nearby car accessory shop to do up the sunshades at his front windscreen, for $20.

We have abt 10-12 members in our Lion gang. Our age varies from 19 to 50++, and we come from different professions eg. Engineers, Programmers, Purchasers, Medical Doctor, Student, Army regular etc. Our area of interests in modifying our rides also differ quite a bit. Probably because the 2 of us are of the same age, SR and I tend to have more common interests in modifying our rides. For instance, both of us like mud-flaps and sporty seats for our rides, whereas the older folks would prefer mud-guards and leather seats.

Sometimes, i feel that my ride has kept me buried deeper in the mundane world, as all what i have done and spent on it are rather unnecessary. Well... I have lots more to say, but i dun wish to write them down. It will make me very judgemental, once again.

**Pic of our Lions (SR and mine) parked at my house carpark**

Do you constantly wonder how and what others think of you? Cut the bullxxt that you dun care how others think or see you. I dun buy that. In fact, I feel that we constantly need feedbacks from others to make our own decisions and judgement in life. Yes, the final choice lies in us, but we r constantly receively feedbacks from others.

Its indeed very amazing how differently my different friends describe me as.

There are friends who describe me as someone emotional, sensitive and easily offended. There are also friends who describe me as unassuming, understanding and patient.

There are friends who find me very noisy, talkative and active. While there are ppl who find me very passive, soft-spoken, reserved and refined.

There are friends who find me very critical, direct and straight-forward. Contrastingly, there are ppl who find me very pretentious, fake and deep.

Well, while i admit there are some variations in my behaviour when facing different ppl, I believe a great extent has also to do with how my friends might have stereotyped me as right from the start, or after certain impactful incidents.

But what you see me here is pretty much what you get in person. I have always made a conscientious effort to be as true as possible on my blog. And at most things that I do not wish to let others know will not appear on my blog. No gimmick.

Parking Idiots in Singapore

I would like to recommend you a very interesting website: http://parkingidiots.blogspot.com/

This website is not only funny and interesting, but also serves its purpose in educating the parking idiots in Singapore. I could easily find a handful of parking idiots around my neighbourhood. Be rest assured i will make my contributions to this website very soon! Hooolay!!!

In HP, I really get the chance to work with my gals. I am kinda convinced that not everyone gets to click with anyone. Whether 2 person can click together depends v much on the chemistry between them.

For instance, there is this gal that i have been working very closely with since day1. She is a very helpful and nice lady. However despite my effort to get close to her (not in that sense), I find myself unable to 'fight' into her market. She remains to keep a distance away from me, and our conversations are pretty much limited to only work matters.

On the other hand, there is another lady that i get to work with only for a few months. We have been chatting quite a lot on MSN, complaining to each other abt work, share abt life and tok a lot of cok. I feel we can just click easily.

There is also another gal from Shanghai that i work with very often. I used to face a lot of resistances from her at work. But ever since we speak on the phone a few times, and started to MSN each other a lot, our working r/s improved tremendously. I used to be so stressed dealing work with her, but now everything has become fun and wonderful!

However, I do not face the same situation when engaging with the guys. To me, most guys are the same and there isnt a need for special techniques or skills to work or deal with them. However, there are a few guys in life that i really have problem engaging with. I duno why, perhaps they dun like my face, or i just simply dun feel like talking to them. haha..

My friend just sent me some pics of her new born baby. Heehee, the baby is so cute. Hmmm... I am looking forward to having a baby at home by the end of the yr. Christmas, pls hurry come!

I have been very busy with my social life lately. My weekdays are packed with meet ups with friends, but my weekends are constrastingly free for the past couple of months. Almost everyday during lunch time, I wud be either meeting my old or new friends for lunch nearby my work place. I am glad that my office location is good, and i have many friends who work nearby at sci park, alexandra park, nus, sim, tiong bahru etc. Its really fun to catch up with old friends, as well as meeting new friends in between work during lunch break.

Nowadays weekdays have become more exciting and fun than my weekends. Living expenses have gone up... a full tank of my partner now cost me $66, compared to the $42 when i first bought it 21 mths ago. Awww.....

Pride & Honour

I have been experiencing great resistances in my writing lately. Could it be because i have not been reading much lately? Hahaha, perhaps writing is just like jogging. The more you read, the more fluent your writing will get.

Anyway, this entry aims to write abt my own BIG FAT EGO. Pls pardon me if u find it a sore to read on.

Last friday, my company had a function held at a KTV lounge, and my colleagues spared no time in making the deejay busy with their song requests. Majority of these ppl's singings sux, yucks. But i applause their courage to sing, ahhaha.

Yes, I am an ego pig and i am always confident with my own singings - probably one of the very very few strengths i have. However, I nv like to sing in front of the crowd, for some funny reasons. Firstly, I do not wish to be seen as showing off or haolian. Secondly, I feel singing shld be for self enjoyment or at most, entertainment for frens. It shld nv be used to impress or prove something to others. Lastly, i do not wish to be hated by others. I just feel tat ppl in general will not be impressed with u if you were to perform better than them. Instead, u incur their jealousy, and this does not apply to only singing but all other things.

With such screwed up mentality, i decided not to sing at all during the event. And a lot of attention was given to another colleague, whom a lot of ppl regarded him as the 'star singer'. Indeed, he could hold his tunes well, but then, i thought his basics and fundamentals of singing is not there. I could do better than him anytime, i thought silently. Throughout his singings, i applauded together with the rest, and nodded superficially when my other colleagues told me how great his singing was.

I guess my ego got the better of me. Under the strong encouragement of another colleague, i decided to select a song to sing eventually. I have to admit that part of my intention was to prove to the ppl tt i could sing as well, if not better. And as expected (to myself), my singing gave an impact to those who stayed back and listen. Its definitely pleasing to my ears to receive their compliments and praises like: WOw, you are then the real star for the day! Wow, we have the best for the last! What a hidden talent we have at PSG (from my director).

However, the light hearted feeling was only short-lived. I am actually more disgusted by my own ego after i went home. My intention is sick to start off with. May I have nothing to do with pride and honour.

Alone, but not lonely

The weather in Singapore is so hot recently that it is almost impossible to find a nice cooling place outdoor. Contrastingly, the condition inside the tropical rainforest is extremely cooling and peaceful. Thanks to the canopies provided by the gigantic rainforest trees. The great contrast in the conditions outside and inside the rainforest makes it even more magnificent and appealing to me.

It was about 12noon when i decided to head down to MacRitchie reservoir. There were very few ppl. In fact, I met not more than 5 ppl along my entire boardwalk journey. The waters are calm, the air is invigorating, while the sky is filled up with fluffy white clouds.

I took the trail instead of the boardwalk as my return path. It was a long peaceful walk. The only sound i could hear were those made by the different insects and my own footsteps. The place was cooling, with pockets of sunrays stealing their way to the forest gounds through the openings of the canopies. I probably met only 2 person throughout my entire journey. I enjoy being alone - alone but definitely not lonely.

I have not been updating my blog as I am practically out every evening.

Last evening, I went to watch Brokeback Mountain with bean. Ever since i took up the module 'Film & History' in NUS, I started to try 'reading' a film instead of just watching it. I was trying to study hard what this movie or the director/author is trying to say. Unfortunately, I was unable to come out with a satisfying answer myself.

Despite the numerous good reviews + winning multiple awards, I couldnt quite appreciate the film. Many have commented how touched they were after the movie which sent their tears down controllably, but i wasnt touched at all. In fact, I could not even feel or sense the love existing between the 2 gay men. I only find the movie very draggy and boring. For the first time I hope to get out of the cinema fast and yearned for its ending.

But i knew the movie is more than meets the eye. I went home to surf the net for reviews. I feel ashamed of my own shallowness. As some reviews said it, its abt how the 2 men battled themselves against the conventions with the force of nature (their love). In fact, the film is not jus abt the 2 men, but also their wives and children. Really feel sorry for their wives .

I was v pissed with work today. I think i have broken my own record of maintaining my anger from morning all the way till evening. Fortunately I was able to cool myself off after skating to and fro the ECP. So i am actually feeling very shiok and light now. Poor emotional control.

Giddy manz

A rather back-dated photo taken a few nites ago when I went KTV with the EVC friends. This is Lena, someone who got along with me very well in the grp. She is her own boss in a cookie/biscuit business.

The EVC friends were pretty shocked after I delivered one of JJ's song "Jiang Nan". They told me they hav nv expected tt i could sing this well. Well, holding the mic and stage performane are nothing unfamiliar to me. But to be able to sing well is definitely a diff story. I may sound 'v nice' to them but i knew i dun sing well, for singing req much skills and techniques which i hav NEVER get to master well when i learnt singing some 6-7 yrs ago.

Jokingly, my EVC friends said that i shld join the Superstar or watever, and they wud definitely support me as an entire EVC gang during the competitions. I joked back tat if i were 5 yrs younger, i wud join the competition. Now i seem more like an uncle (according to Kici!!!) than someone youthful and vibrant out there.

This afternoon, i din know wat happened to me but i suddenly felt like blacking out. Jus like the past few blood donation experiences, dark squares began to fill up my visions as my head started to spin. Fortunately i was able to react fast by finding a seat nearby. Despite my effort not to alert friends by my side, i guess my very pale lips and body breaking into sweats profusely gave me away. I have to cancel by evening prog and went hope to sleep for the entire late aftn till evening. I hope its not something 'dirty' disturbing me again.

I am very honoured to be able to serve Ven Kai Zhao as his chauffeur today. During one of the stops, Shifu bought a set of statues featuring Buddha and his 5 disciples collecting alms. To show his gratitude to the boss of this shop, Shifu shared with him some Dharma.

Shifu told us that the main purpose of Buddha statue is not for the pleasing of the eye. Rather, its for us to learn the Dharma. Shifu also told the boss that if the statues were to land up at a wealthy man's house, probably only his family and his visitors will be able to appreciate the statues. However if the statues were to be placed in a monastry, every worshippers will be able to benefit from the statues. Instantly, i see the twist in 'fate' of this set of statues. From residing in a quiet corner of a very ulu shop at Holland Rd, the statues will soon serve their purpose in the large monastery. Sadhu to the boss & the person who carved out these statues!

Once again, Shifu reminded us in the Dharma talk that instead of spending more time to study and watch within ourselves, we are constantly seeking external sources to nurse our sufferings and fufil our own desires. This teaching was not new to me, but it has nv struck me tt much unti Shifu repeatedly told us recently. We are also reminded that learning Dharma is supposed to help us reduce our sufferings. If we were to get ourselves upset or disappointed for failing to meet our expectations in the Dharma practices, then we have defeated our purpose of learning the Dharma altogether.

I am very happy today cos i woke up in the morning to see a msg from a friend, J, who wanted to find out more abt Buddhism and meditation. J was my snr in CACS (the other ECA i joined other than NUSBS) who knew i was into buddhism. I duno where i can intro her on meditation, but i intend to share with her some Dharma books which are always readily available in my Partner!

On the other hand, I am getting rather disappointed with a fren, who has complained to me that how weak the Singapore Buddhist community is. He felt that the spiritual support is not enough, and he does not feel motivated to learn buddhism, because nobody tells him which are the good temples, who are the good teachers and when are the buddhist activities. I have tried SMS and calling him to attend Ven KZ's talks for at least 3 saturdays, but he always find excuses not to turn up. Well, I guess there s really a limit that we can do. The rest is really up to individual. Taking care of myself in my spiritual cultivation is my top priority now.

Oh Yes.. congrats to Teddy for his oustanding academic performance. He was explaining to us his project at the NTU -watever-fair today. Heehee...

Updates on Jessy

Made a visit down to TTSH this evening. Saw many familiar faces from CMC, ruiting, fake lorraine, yeeling(foo), Zish, TongJoo and EnYung.

Jessy was very wide awake, and was making rather big hands and legs movements. However, she is still unable to speak, or respond well to the visitors around her. Although pretty much in a daze state, she looks much more vibrant as compared to few days ago.

Let us continue to dedicate our merits to her.

My msn nick 明知山有虎，偏向虎山行 attracted quite a few friends, who msg me which 'mountain' i am refering to. Well, to all my friends who do not understand chinese, the direct translation is " You already know that the mountain got tiger, yet you still insist in climbing that mountain". Hahaha. ..my translation very powerful rite?

Bei Jin was asking me if i am planning to get married. He joked that once u get married, you will have a tigeress at home, wahahahah. To me, my mountain can refer to a lot of things. Generally, i just feel that there are a lot of things which we know are not beneficial to us, but yet we cannot help control ourselves to get involved or engaged with them. Procrastination is one very fine example.

Sometimes, we thought our moral values and principles are so strong tat we will not be easily swayed or moved by the external factors. Yet when the temptations or appeal become too strong, we then realise how weak our principles and values are.

Latest update on Jessy, thanks to Beijin and Yeeling (foo): Jessy has woken up from her long sleep, but unable to speak due to those tubes still inserted in her mouth. However, she was able to recognise the people and could respond to them with her hand movements. I am also touched when some of my friends reading my blog (but not knowing jessy personally) are also praying for her. Thanks!

Let us continue to dedicate our merits to her!

Zoooooo..........

Hahahaha, big kids visiting the zoo. It was fun visiting the zoo with my FOC2000 gang. But instead of paying great attention to the animals, I got more interested in snapping shots on the surrounding reservoir. The Zoo is possibly one of the v few available grounds in Sg where we can access to the central reservoirs in Singapore. Most of the banks are covered by v thick forests and inaccessible to all.

We have 2 more new entries in our grp - boyfriends of Jessica and Sihui. Finally there are more guys than gals in the gang, and we have 2 more cars as well, meaning it will be less taxing on me.

This evening, a lady friend told me tt i tend to be very selective in making friends. Tats her observations made during our EVC and skating outings. Well, the zest in me to mix around with ppl has long been gone. I duno where it has gone to. I probably only speak to ppl who are more proactive and take the initative to talk to me - hence i was seen as selective.

I am currently rather upset with myself. I feel my situation is like this: 明知山有虎，偏向虎山行.

Latest update for Jessy: According to Jessy's brother, the doctors reduced her medication dosage as she's responding well. Doctor said to let her wake up on her own. No need to rush her.

Updates on Jessy

I visited Jessy again this evening. He brother told us not to try wake her up, as she is still under strong medication after the brain surgery. Most probably the doctors will try to wake her up in a few days' time. And yes, she is still in TTSH ICU Ward 3A. So I guess her condition is still under critical.

To the many concerned friends out there, I am sorry I do not have the details of her accident. So pls do not ask me for the details. I only know she was knocked down while crossing the road, and she also suffers from a fractured limb.

Vincent (kwan), Zhiyong, Weigan, Shiongwei, Alex, Sabrina, Wilsanto and Pearlyn were there at TTSH when i went there jus now. I heard xiaowei, ananda, fengying, eunice, meibei and fenny were there earlier. Last evening, ppl from CMC, PKS and Ji Jing Hu Fa Yuan (Ven Kaizhao's centre) were there also, and some of these ppl do not know Jessy personally. I am very touched by the support given by the buddhist community. Having a religion is good as we always can fall back on our religion for support and guidiance whenever we are lost or need help.

Pls wake up soon

It was a terrible piece of news tat I received while driving. My heart sank upon reading the SMS from Fenny at the traffic light junction. Jessy was involved in a car accident. Her brain was bleeding and was in an unstable condition at ICU. And tts just hrs before her flight to Myammar for her long retreat.

Flashback: Last week, Shiongwei, me and Jessy were happily walking from YIH to the SRC carpark. I have offered to drive both of them home. We were all v happy to see one another back at DC as it reminded us of our schooling days. Jessy was urging us to continue NUSBS DC as she could no longer come down anymore. She has quitted her job and was ready to fly to myammar for her long retreat. The following day, I met her again at CMC meditation, Cheng Beng. We were arranging the meditation mats and cushions together, and she also shared her feelings on going for her long term retreat soon.

Jessy was in the same orientation grp as me during FOC2000. Jus days ago, I remembered one of the ice-breaking games we played at EA - which is to state 3 statements abt yrself (2 true, 1 false) , and ask the other grp members to guess which is the fake statement. Jessy pulled out a stunt by giving all 3 true statements. Frankly speaking, I didnt know if she purposely did that, or she really didnt know the rule of the game. But it was a memorable game for me.

And the 2 of us often joke tat we r probably the ONLY 2 ppl left in our batch of freshies tat remain so active in NUSBS after so many yrs since FOC2000. In fact, I see that most(if not all) of the freshies from our batch have drifted far away from Buddhism, except for Jessy, who has progressed healthily over the yrs in her cultivation. She even shared with me how she selects the various esscence from different buddhist traditions and put them into her practice.

Jus now, the 40++ of us were doing our best to chant for Jessy's safety. Various buddhist grps have rushed down after their individual activities to encourage Jessy to push on. She has completed her surgery but is still in the unconcious state. We all hope she wakes up soon.

Driven by Materialism

This evening's Dharma circle, I shared to my juniors how materialistic actually I am as a person. Although I constantly tell myself not to get tempted by material means, I find myself the greatest victim of all.

Recently, I get re-connected to this army friend who comes from a filthy rich family. His parents have bought a few private housings in Singapore, but are often overseas. His brother is staying in one of the apartments, while he is staying at another (the one facing Sentosa). This friend has extended his invitation to my army gang to ask if anyone is interested in shifting in with him.

What makes this offer appealing is that his apartment has got very posh furnishings. There is a swimming pool and gym facing the sea, and he is not keeping any rentals. All he needs is to have some friends to 'brighten' up his apartment with noise and laughters. Most imptly, his apartment is jus 3 min's drive to my workplace, and there is free and private carpark spaces. And I dun think i will ever get a chance to stay in such a high class private apartment (probably one of the most sought for apt in Singapore).

Whilst i feel v tempted to shift in, i also feel very disgusted with myself. I can actually be so easily driven by materialism. If i cannot afford such a posh lifestyle, then i shldnt get myself engaged in it. I shld only enjoy whatever within my means. I shld spend only what i earn. Moreover, there is no free lunch in this world. I dun wanna live in a world owing to ppl. And why shld such a rich guy with family of high societal status get associated with medicore like us? He may welcome us for now but i cant tell wat will happened in the long run. I dun wana feel despised.

The surprising fact is none of my friends are taking up his offer. It shows everyone has brains.

Lately, I have been writing many superficial stuffs on my blog, becos i wanna avoid writing stuffs which require the exercising of my judgement on others. My friend has chided me for being too judgemental, which i agree totally.

However lately, there have been some pretty disturbing cases among my friends.

First, there is this gal friend of mine who is getting rather troubled with several guys chasing her at the same time. And the unfortunate fact is that all these guys happened to be my personal friends. All of us are well connected via the MSN. I have to limit my conversation and be extremely careful when talking to anyone of them. I do not wish to influence anything. But sometimes its kinda unavoidable when they tend to msg u for more info. To be frank, I am not supportive to any of the guys, for i see what the gal needs most now is to have a good break.

Second, I have this old friend who has been msging me lately on his love troubles with this lady. And this lady is not our age, not someone much younger, but someone much older. She is already in her 50s, and my friend is my age. Initially, I thought he was only joking with me so i didnt give a damm to his msg. But not until recently, after seeing how affected he is then i realise he is actually getting very serious.

Few yrs ago, I have another classmate calling me in the middle of the night when i was sleeping in PGP, telling me abt his love problem with his gf. His gf was 13 yrs his snr, and their age gap has been a great hurdle for the 2 of them. They have since broken up though and both are coping fine now. As for my friend as mentioned earlier, I really duno how i can help him as a friend. I am speechless when he called me. I dun even know how to reply his sms, and i am meeting him tmr for a dinner.

I do not really blame (who am i to blame) my friends for their 'stupidity' and foolishness. I think to love is a rather natural process. And sometimes, I could see how loose my grip has become, as I unknowingly got tempted to wanna be in love again. But the idea of expectations + attachments often turn me off almost immediately, in battle with my cravings and ignorance.

Cars

I always know myself as a great fan of automobils, esp on Mercedes Classic cars. Few evenings ago, I was driving home from ECP when i saw this classic (not vintage) Mercedes 190 in front of me. I took the risk of picking up my hp to snap a few shots. Wah.. its really dammm coooool..... if only i get the chance to drive or travel in one of them.

Friends who have visited my room before would have seen my huge glass cupboard, parked with 100s of car models of various brands and designs. In fact, both my dad and brother are also car lovers. This can be judged by the number of family cars we have changed over the past few decades (listed in chronological order, if not owned at the same time):

1) Mini Cooper 850cc - SV
2) Toyota Corolla 1.3 - SE
3) Toyotal Corolla 1.5 - EM
4) Mitsubishi Gallant 1.6 - EU
5) Toyota Corona 1.8 - EV
6) Honda Accord 1.6 - SBC
7) Nissan Laurel 2.0 - SBC
8) Mercedes Benz E300 - SCF
9) Nissan March 1.0 - SCN
10) Hyundai Sonata 2.0 - SCU
11) Kia Rio 1.5 - SDW
12) Peugeot Partner 1.9 - GX
13) Toyota Altis 1.6 - SFL
14) Toyota Liteace 1.8 - GQ
15) Toyota Hiace 2.4 - GY

As I obtained my driving license only in 2000, hence i only get to drive car #8 and onwards. However, i am still fortunate enough to have experienced driving diff makes of cars from Germany, France, Japan and Korea. From my personal experiences, i really feel tat there is a very great significant difference betw Korean cars and Japanese ones. Of cos there is no doubt tat European vehicles give me the best experience. Lately, I heard there are great improvements in the Japanese models (like cefiro and camry), but i havent gotten the chance to drive them yet. Korean cars? Pls. . i doubt i will ever buy it (again).

Well, most ppl in singapore who own cars are actually the poorer ppl, whereas ppl without cars are the richer ones. Owning a car makes u $1K poorer every mth. But i am born a sucker for cars...